BREAKING: Disney World Closing Due to COVID Outbreak
Breaking news, Disney World is closing due to a COVID outbreak. More than 15 people infected by COVID have been connected to visiting Disney World last week.
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Disney World Fireworks Will No Longer Be Free
Disney World fireworks will no longer be free. Starting this summer, Disney will charge guests $50 per person to watch their fireworks.
Disney World No Longer Accepts Food Stamps
Breaking news, Disney World is no longer accepting food stamps (SNAP). This is effective immediately and has a ton of families upset and worried.
Couple Caughting Making Love on Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster
A couple was caught making love on Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster. They were arrested and banned for life from Disney World because of this.
Disney World Dress Code Now Bans Leggings
The Disney World dress code now bans leggings. According to an internal source, this is due to the controversial and inappropriate nature of those pants.
Disney Adding Pole Dancers to Their Monorail Cars
Disney is adding pole dancers to their monorail cars. This is to improve the guest experience and give guests a more enjoyable ride on their monorails.
BREAKING: ICE Raids Coming to Disney World
Breaking news, ICE Raids are coming to Disney World this week. According to an internal source, President Trump has authorized multiple ICE raids at Disney.
Disney Adds a Weight Limit To Their Theme Parks
Disney adds a weight limit to their theme parks. Now, in order to enter a Disney World park you must weigh less than 200 lbs.
Republicans Now Qualify for Disney’s Disability Pass (DAS)
Republicans now qualify for Disney’s Disability Access Service (DAS). However, this announcement is very controversial on both sides of the aisle.
Official Top 5 Best Places to Die at Disney World
Dying at Disney World is on the bucket list of many people. They want to go out at the most magical place on earth. Here are the best places to die there
Rent Children at Disney World: Now Available
You can now rent children at Disney World. This controversial update allows childless Disney Adults to visit the theme parks with kids.
Disney World Releases $100,000 Park Ticket
Disney World releases a $100,000 park ticket. The benefits of this ticket might be worth it if you have the money as it includes hotel stays and more.
Top 5 Worst Rides at Disney World – Official Rank
These are the top 5 worst rides at Disney World. This ranking is based on multiple factors and is widely considered an official ranking by a variety of experts.
Labubu Characters Taking Over Disney World
Labubu characters debut at Walt Disney World. This is a brand new meet and greet experience with the hottest new plush characters.
Breaking: Disney World Raising Drinking Age to 31
Breaking news, Disney World is raising their drinking age to 31. This is due to an increase in issues from guests drinking in their parks.
5 Things We Would Do Immediately If We Were The Disney CEO
These are the five things we would do immediately if we were the Disney CEO. These ideas would be a drastic improvement to Disney World.
Fart Finders Are Being Installed Inside Disney World
Fart Finders are being installed inside Disney World. This new patented technology will detect anytime someone farts inside the park.
Disney World Implementing New One Child Policy
If you want to visit Disney World, you will need to have at least one kid with you. This is part of Disney’s new one child policy
Disney World Canceling All Fireworks Shows Permanently
Disney World is cancelling all fireworks shows permanently. This is because they are contributing to climate change according to experts.
Disney World Bans Pride Clothes Inside Their Parks
Disney World bans pride clothes inside their parks. This is because of the controversial nature of pride gear, much like their ban of MAGA hats.