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BREAKING: Disney World Implements The Death Penalty
Guests caught breaking rules at Disney World may be subject to the death penalty. Disney is implementing the death penalty to deter rule breakers.
A Skibidi Toilet Ride is Coming to Disney World
Skibidi Toilet is replacing Guardians of the Galaxy: Cosmic Rewind. Disney is closing one of their most popular rides, replacing it with a toilet head.
Anna and Kristoff Will Get Divorsed in Frozen 3
Not only does Elsa marry a woman in Frozen 3, but her sister, Anna, gets married and divorced with Kristoff. This is a dark twist for a Disney movie.
First-Ever Tortured Poets Department Concert at Disney
Taylor Swift will perform her first-ever Tortured Poets Department concert inside Disney World. The concert will be free with a valid theme park admission.
BREAKING: Disney World May be Closing Permanently in 2025
In breaking Disney news, Walt Disney World may be closing in 2025. This is due to poor financials as well as a losing battle to Universal Studios.
New Land, Nostalgialand is Coming to The Magic Kingdom
A brand new land is coming to The Magic Kingdom. Nostalgialand will be made of extinct Disney attractions like Maelstrom, Great Movie Ride, and more.
Women Can Now Have an Abortion Inside Disney World
In a controversial move, women can now get an abortion inside Disney World. This is part of the new Planned Parenthood inside the Magic Kingdom.
Splash Mountain Officially Returning to Disney World
In a controversial move, Disney is bringing Splash Mountain back. It’s part of the Beyond Big Thunder expansion, allowing Tiana’s Bayou Adventure to remain.
Joe Biden Promises Free Disney World Tickets
In order to buy more votes, Joe Biden is promising all Americans free 5-day tickets to Disney World. Of course, there are many concerns over this proposal.
BREAKING: The 2025 Masters Will Played at Disney World
In breaking news, the 2025 Masters Tournament will be hosted at Disney World. Disney bought the rights to host The Masters 5 years for a whopping $500 million.
Have Your Funeral at Disney World for $15,000
Guests can now have a funeral at Disney World for only $15,000. The service includes putting the corpse on the ride for one last ride with family and friends.
Disney World Will Fire All Cast Members by 2030
100,000 Cast Members will be out of a job at Disney World by 2030. They will be replaced with AI robots, which are said to do a better job than humans.
Experts Confirm That Mickey Mouse Isn’t Real
A shocking study is out claiming that Mickey Mouse isn’t real. Experts state that it is actually a man or a woman inside a costume.
BREAKING: Disney Hires Claudine Gay as New CEO
Claudine Gay is the new Disney CEO. According to sources, Gay has a long history of successfully copying others, which is what Disney needs.
Disney World Changing All Ride Audio to Spanish
Everything on Disney rides like songs and characters talking will now be in Spanish to be more inclusive. You can rent a Spanish translation headset if needed.
A Titanic Free Fall Water Ride is Coming to Disney World
A new thrill ride is coming to Disney World. The Titanic will be turned into a ride with a scary free fall element where the boat isn’t attached to any track
Tangled Lantern Festival Ride Replacing it’s a small world
it’s a small world is closing permanently and will be replaced with Tangled Festival of Lights. This new ride will be a journey through Tangled
More Than 100 Squatters Legally Take Over Disneyland
The squatter problem has hit Disneyland as more than 100 squatters legally take over the park. Disney has nothing they can do about it either
Disney World Banning Trump Voters From Their Parks
In a shocking twist Disney World is banning Trump voters from Entering their parks. This is an effort to create a more welcoming and inclusive environment
Suite Life of Zack & Cody Reboot Coming to Disney+
A Suite Life of Zack & Cody reboot is coming to Disney+ where Zack and Cody experience the difficulties of being a millennial, while at The Tipton